Ray,
This is a funny sort of cameo that has potential to become a very humorous, or serious poem. Right now, I'm not sure which you mean it to be, for the last stanza confuses me. I do like how you specify brands in the second stanza and would like to 'see' even more detail, perhaps even an interesting story about when the "pink Durexes" failed.
I can't picture a "touch of innocence" wrapping and suggest you use another noun--perhaps "A pinch" or something sexually suggestive.
Also, I think you left out "us" to follow "shield" in that stanza, didn't you? And just what are the lingering fallacies of life?
In spite of these issues, I enjoy the tone and subject matter of the poem and think you have created something worth expanding. Keep "golden wrapped magnums" and "lubricated desire" though. Nice work!
Pauline
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