An exploring possibilities exercise:
Approximations
Riding around in your new hydrangeas,
we lose ourselves in a euphoric funk of
which-a-ways and that-a-ways, knowing
that eventually we would arrive at displeasure
with having to make our way into broccoli
and biscuits, missing out on the panoramic
flow of ants and lizards craning and zipping
all over the horizon. We wonder where
time fell and if it could be made into wool.
Perhaps not. Nevertheless, it will be useful
in keeping track of winter clothes and putting
out the trash. But what about tomorrow’s guest
list and all the marbles strewn along the path?
Leave them for the experts, I say. We existentialists
only care about the moon and what it will
tell us tonight when the dogs start crowing.
And anyway, the butter will soften in starlight
while you and I melt into eggrock.
Pauline,
ReplyDeleteI think this is an interesting calisthenic exercise. I actally like this cathisthenic method/exercise so much that I believe I am going to use the approach for mine- so thanks! :)
Back to your response:
For starters, this exercise has so many oddities working together, line after line; those oddities really make this piece stand apart. The language, the imagery, the line breaks, everything has such a true 'feel' to it. By this, I mean that as I read through each line, it is as if I can actually feel-touch-the objects as I see them appear on the page. That's particularly intersting to me because I feel that is a hard feat to accomplish for a lot of poets. What's more, this piece would make for a great expansion. I think you already have such an advantage within this calisthenic exercise, that it wouldn't be anything to pull snippets, or even the whole draft, and compile it into an AWESOME working piece- go for it! I really admire you work. I think you have done such a wonderful job this semester, and through reading your work you have helped me progress in mine. It was great having you as a classmate! Thanks!!